Allthingshoops

I waited, I waited, and I waited….and I waited..

The Rockets won 22 straight, the greatest tournament in basketball is about to commence, the NBA FINALLY realizes Bruce Bowen is a dirty player, and yet no one has mentioned the most under-appreciated story of the season…

WHY IS KEVIN DURANT PLAYING THE 2??????

I’ve been meaning to write about this for a long time, and after the Nuggets scored a NBA season high 168 against the Sonics, enough is enough….

WHY IS KEVIN DURANT PLAYING THE 2?????

Kevin Durant should not win the Rookie Of The Year, and he most likely won’t.  Let’s face it, with all the hype surrounding Durant when he first came into the league, he has been a disappointment.  But how much of that is his fault???

WHY IS KEVIN DURANT PLAYING THE 2??

I think Sonics management are under pressure from Stern and Evil Bennett to employ one of the worst head coaches in league.  By keeping PJ Carliesmo, the Sonics will keep losing, and not just losing but getting embarassed, much like last night against the Nuggets.  Carliesmo will drive all his players to the brink of insanity.  You thought Sprewell choking him was bad?  Just wait.  Soon enough the entire Sonics squad will hire a hitman to take out their coach.

It’s a mystery to me why he still has a job??  Especially since he is destorying Durant’s career.  If you watch the Sonics this year, Durant has no idea how to play the 2 spot, and for a 6-10 guy with a wing span longer than Tayshaun Prince, he has no business playing the 2.  Durant needs to play the 3 and score off of put backs and easy baskets, but instead he is taking off balance outside shots and missing them horribly.

You can already see the effect playing the 2 has on Durant.  He is not as active on offense because he knows he has to create his own offense; there are no easy baskets for him.   When Durant misses badly on the jumper, it also lowers his confidence a little bit, and it snowballs into a poor shooting night, which translates to a poor shooting season.  Furthermore, the Sonics are one of the worst rebounding teams in the league, and instead of putting Durant on the block and letting him rebound and block shots, he is on the wing.  Playing the 2 also means Durant has to play the ball, and it takes away his ability to read defense and get steals.

KD is not playing at his natural position, and it’s going to cost him rookie of the year and if it continues, his whole career.  Over the summer, during the Olympic scrimmage game, Durant was one of the better players, and from that game, you can clearly see his effectiveness playing the 3 spot.

With that said??

WHY IS KEVIN DURANT PLAYING THE 2???

I hope Durant’s career don’t mirror that of Colin Farell, lots of hype (rememeber Colin Farell was suppose to be the next Brad Pitt), followed by too many bad movies, and eventually you are only famous because of a sex tape you made.

Say it ain’t so, Kevin…Say it ain’t so…

On Wednesday, Feb 13, I will be in Orlando watching the Magic take on the Nuggets.  I should have a few minutes before the game to talk with AI and Carmelo.  I am taking questions from my readers to ask AI.  Please let me know what you want me to ask AI or Carmelo.  Like your teachers always told you, there are no stupid questions.

 Here are some questions I plan on hitting them with.

For AI.

What do you think about Pau Gasol going to the Lakers? Do you think Chris Wallace was high when he made the trade? Or is he just plain dumb?

I am usually the smallest guy on the court, what advice do you have for smaller guys trying to hoop? It’s obvious, aside from Isiah, you are the greatest 6 ft or under guard to every play the game.

Growing up, who were your favorite players?

In your opinion, who has the sickest crossover in the league?

You are the first NBA player to rock the sleeve on the shooting arm; now everyone is copying it. What made you decide to wear it? Also, I have a sleeve too, but I am too scared to wear it on the court because I am not very good. Any advice?

Every year, we hear talk of your “decline” before the season, and every year, you prove all the moronic writers wrong. How do you stay so consistent for so long? How do you play through the injuries and take the abuse night in and night out? I know it’s not steroids.

Which Iverson shoes is your favorite?

Who has a better jump shot, you, Melo, or JR? who would win in horse?

For Melo.

When is Lala going to return to TV? Or is she done?

What do you think about my nickname, Go Get It, for Dwight Howard?

This just in, the Heat have traded Shaq to the Suns for Shawn Marion and Marcus Banks..

On the surface, the trade makes less sense than the Gasol trade; however, Pat Riley and Steve Kerry are no fools.  Yes, Riley traded for Ricky Davis, but we all make mistakes. 

Instead of jumping on the bandwagon with the rest of the wannabe journalist/writers, I will tell you why this trade makes sense…

The Suns get to dump a grumpy Marion, and they don’t have to worry about extending his contract.  Getting rid of Marion also helps the Suns with their chemistry problem. 

The Heat can now play a more up-tempo offense, and most importantly, they are no longer undersized at the 3 and the 4.  Too many times this season, Ricky Davis would defend opposing team’s small forward, and with the size advantage, opposing small forwards scores easily over Davis.  Haslem is also undersized, but he is a better defender.  So it’s the problems created by the mismatch is not as glaring.

It’s easy to question Shaq’s health and age, and I think it’s absolutely despicable that all the moronic writers are writing Shaq off because of his age.  It’s easy to kick a man when he is down, and that’s what everyone has been doing all season.  Look, I wrote about this repeatly in my other posts.  Shaq’s troubles this season stems from his off-the-court personal problems and the late night partying with Ricky Davis.  My sources on South Beach tell me that Shaq and Ricky are out every night.  It’s time to break them up.  It will do both of them some good.

With that said, Shaq is going to do great in Phoenix, and I think he will be motivated. 

Forget ESPN!! Check allthingshoops.com for the latest and greatest!! 

My inside source have confirmed that the Memphis Grizzlies have traded Pau Gasol to the Lakers for Kwame Brown, Javris Crittenton, and future 2008 and 2010 1st round draft picks.

 WOW!! Unbelieveable!  This trade is so one sided that I can’t believe the Grizzlies pulled the trigger on this one?  Is Isiah or Billy King running the show over there?  Why would the Grizzlies give up their one true all star and center for a pupu platter with no all stars in return?? 

Also, why the Lakers?  Memphis could’ve probably gotten back Amare or Marion if they called the Suns??

From the Lakers’ stand point, this trade makes them instant contenders.  But with Bynum quickly developing at the center position, what position is Pau going to play??

I am going crazy over this trade.  I don’t know what to make of it.

Anyways, more analysis on this trade later.

Stephen A. Smith reported last night a 3 team trade that would send Kidd to the Mavs, Brandon Bass and Harris to the Blazers, and Channing Frye, Travis Outlaw, Jarett Jack and Jerry Stackhouse to the Nets.

My initial reaction to this report…

The Blazers are not stupid enough to pull this trade….

Strictly by potential, Frye and Outlaw are #3 and #4 on the roster (#1 and #2 are Oden and Aldridge, Roy already hit the ceiling).  Besides, the Blazers have great chemistry, and they can make the playoffs in the tough Western conference with this young squad.  Why break it up?? Devin Harris? He is a slight upgrade over Steve Blake.  Brandon Bass? he is a black Mark Mad Dog Madsen with more offensive skills.  There’s no way the Blazers will pull the trigger on this one. 

This trade would help the Mavs, but it’s too much one sided favoring the Nets.  Rod Thorn needs to realize that he is dealing with Kevin Pritchard, and not Billy King or Isiah Thomas. 

This deal is dead..like Stephen A’s show…

After a flurry of updates last week, I caught a nasty cold, but now I am back.  So let’s get you caught up with hoops.

Michael Beastly Beasley ended Kansas State’s 24 game losing streak to Kansas.  KState haven’t beat Kansas since 1983!!  Well, KState won last night, and the Beast himself guaranteed victory prior to the game.  It’s nice to see that some players can actually back up their guarantees. 

Some thoughts about this game….

I have been telling everyone that Kansas is overrated.  Kansas is overrated EVERY year.  Look for them to have a quick exit in March.  I am predicting the Sweet 16.  Mark my words…

Michael Beastly Beasley has a nice outside touch.  He hit a few 3s last night, and he has a nice outside shot.  The release is a little slow, but the form is good.  I see him developing into a David West type player, but he is more vocal and flamboyant.  So he won’t fly under the radar like West.  Speaking of West, let’s hope he gets in the All Star game.  He has been balling for the Hornets, and it’s time he gets some recognition.

Speaking of overrated teams, Memphis is still #1, but they play in a weak conference.  Put the Tigers in the ACC or the Big East, and they won’t even be the best team in the conference.  That’s why I think college hoop rankings are pointless.  Sure it’s nice to see your team on the rankings every week, but if your team chokes in the tournament, then it doesn’t matter how many weeks you were number 1.  Again, look for Memphis to make a quick exit in March.  I am predicting the Elite 8 at best.

Alright, let’s move on to the big boys league…

Lebron hits the game winner in Portland and stares down a heckler; I love it!  When will the fans learn? Lebron was having a mediocre game until the 4th quarter when he went off for 17 points, including 3 triples, oh and that game winning shot.  Speaking of that game winning shot, it was a layup.  Yes, A LAYUP.  Lebron blew by Roy and 3 other defenders and just laid it in.  It was pretty anti-climatic…

Prior to the game, Lebron begged Cavs management to trade for Kidd.  It’s too bad that the Cavs don’t have any assets to bring Kidd to Cleveland.  Maybe Rod Thorn will be dumb enough to go for Hughs, Marshall, and Eric Snow’s expiring contract.  Oh wait, I had Thorn confuse with Isiah (ahh I feel better already now that I have taken my daily jab at Zeke).

So if the Cavs can’t land Kidd, who can they trade for to get Lebron some help?  No one has mentioned this possibility, and I guarantee you after I write it about, all the wannabe EPSN analyst will jump over it.  The expiring contracts of Shannon Brown and Ira Newble for JR Smith and Chucky Atkins.  Let me tell you why this trade makes sense for both sides..

JR Smith is an All-Star waiting to happen.  JR is 6-6, can shoot from the 3, can drive to the basket, and he is young.  In Denver, JR is not getting the playing time he needs to develop.  You put him next to Lebron, and he is an instant All-Star.  He is better than Hughs in shooting and finishing around the basket, and he is a solid on the ball defender.  It makes sense for the Cavs, and it gives Denver some salary relief.  JR is too good to sit on the bench. 

As for Chucky Atkins, Atkins is not Kidd or Bibby, but he is a better PG than Jones/Snow/Hughs.  Chucky will knock down some occasional 3s, and he will run the team and play D.  The Cavs need a cheap PG, and Chucky is that guy.

 This trade makes sense for both sides because Denver is already 8 million in the luxury tax, and Newble and Brown’s expiring contract will save them around 6 million next year.  As for the Cavs, Smith and Atkins will help the Cavs immediately, and they both have reasonable contracts.

Now that’s a trade that makes sense…

Come Danny Ferry!! Pull the trigger!!

Word out of Phoenix is the Suns are considering trading Amare.  All the internet bloggers are going crazy over this story.  Again, I hate to say it, but I told you so! I have repeatly stressed the Suns’ NEED to move Amare.  Amare is just not the same player he was before his two knee surgeries.  The old Amare is a potential MVP winner every year, and the new Amare is merely a solid All-Star that’s good for 20/10 for a few years.  Time is dwindling for the Suns and Nash, if they don’t win it all this year, I don’t think they have the youth or the cap room to make another run.  Some rumored trade scenarios are Amare for Chris Bosh, or Gasol.  The Amare for Bosh rumors probably stems from the Brian Colangelo’s ties to Phoenix, and it’s no secret that Gasol needs to go to a contender.  Both of these trades would work in terms of salary, and I think it works out pretty evenly for both sides.  Both Bosh and Gasol can rejuvenate their careers with Nash at the point, and most importantly both of them won’t mind sharing the offensive load with Shawn Marion.  According to CBS, ”Amare’s increased frustration with not being the focal point of the team’s offense” is causing chemistry problems.  I also believe that Amare lacks the mental toughness to be a leader on the Suns.  If you are a Phoenix fan, I would strongly urge all of you to attack the message boards, internet blogs, and forums to push for the trade.  Nash can’t do it alone, and Amare won’t lead you to the promise land. 

In other trade rumors, apparently, Isiah Idiot Thomas declined a trade involving Artest for Balkman and Nate Robinson.  I applauded Isiah for this move, until I realized he is betting Artest will sign with the Knicks this summer for the mid-level.  Let me get this straight, Isiah wants to add to the salary cap even more, and he expects Artest, an all star, to sign for the mid level exception, much like Jared Jefferies and Jerome James did?  For a split second there, I actually thought Isiah was acting wisely, but again, I was wrong.

Speaking of the Knicks, NY’s public enemy #2, Stephon Marbury, is out indefinitely, and his future in NY is uncertain.  Knick fans can finally rejoice!!  Without Marbury, the Knicks have won 3 straight, and without the poisonous Marbury, the Knicks have shown better chemistry on the court and more resolve.  Rumor around the league is after Marbury returns from surgery, the Knicks will buy him out, and he will sign for the minimum to play in Boston.  The Celtics took a chance on Marbury’s cousin, Telfair, do they really want to make the same mistake again?  No tommy point if the C’s make this move.  Just get Stephon out of the league, and it will be beneficial for everyone.  Also, while we are on Steph, “the business man,” his shoes are clearance for $8 dollars at Steve&Barry’s.  You won’t catch me with these on even if I got them for free.

Gotta love Knicks, they always give you something to work with everyday.

Let’s move on to real hoops.

The Cavs beat the Spurs last night, thanks to a dozen bad calls by the refs, maybe they were trying to make up for last year.  I am glad Tony, wannabe rapper, Longoria didn’t get any calls last night, and the refs even ignored academy award winner, Manu Ginoboli.  Although I must say, in order for the Cavs to make that next step, they need to learn how to execute in the half court.  The Spurs are so efficient in executing their half court offense; meanwhile, when the Cavs are in their half court set, it’s usually Lebron vs. the other team. 

The Suns finally beat the Lakers, and Kobe only had 30.  They would’ve won if he went for 50+.  That’s what they need from him every night.  The crowd also continuously booed Kwame Brown.  I would too if that’s who we got for Caron Butler.

I received some pretty harsh comments from yesterday’s posts.  I think Stephon Marbury left one under the cryptic name, “Jimmy”, and he called me a “broken condom white boy” along with other expletives.  I was actually quite proud that I pissed off “Jimmy” so much that all he can do is resort to sophomoric personal attacks.  Keep up the good work, “Jimmy”.  Just for the record though, I am not white, and I don’t wear condoms (just ask your mom).

Anyways, now I’ve addressed that, let’s move on to “realitycheck”.

Realitycheck writes :

“Noah needs to keep his mouth shut and play.

Rooks have no biz screaming at coaches or getting in the grill of a 4-time DPOY with a championship ring.

PERIOD.

And dipshit bloggers who circle like vultures over a guy who has a HOF career and is in decline and fighting multiple injuries while on a team that is a trainwreck, should just go crawl back under their rocks and squirm around in the slime they call home.

You’re trying to talk effort smack about a guy who went undrafted and had to fight and work his way up for everything he ever achieved, which includes a title… that’s just FUCKING STUPID.”

First of all, I am not talking smack about Ben; I am merely stating the fact that he is overpaid and overrated.  I am not at all discounting Ben’s struggles growing up and making it in the league.  I think it’s a great story, and it shows that hard work will eventually pay off.

The point I was trying to make is Wallace is overpaid and overrated.  Wallace is in the second year of a 4 year/60 million contract, and his season averages are 9 boards, 5 pts, and 1.7 blks.  Now compare those numbers to the other starting centers/forwards in the East and take into account Wallace’s salary, then it’s evident that Wallace is grossly overpaid.

As for the HOF?  Ben MIGHT get into the HOF because of those four DPOY.  I say MIGHT because the media will realized that Ben won those DPOY by default, and his career numbers are purely pedistrian.  Even during his prime, his numbers were comparable to that of Juwon Howard, except Howard averaged 18/10, Ben averaged 12/10.  Furthermore, when you stack Ben up against the other 4 time DPOY, Dikembe Mutombo, who not only had better numbers than Ben but also played against some of the best centers of all time.  Ben Wallace’s career averages are comparable to Jayson Williams and no where close to another great rebounder, Dennis Rodman.  Rodman has FIVE rings, 7 rebounding titles, and 2 DPOY, and he will barely get into the Hall.  Ben won’t make it to Springfield; he doesn’t deserve it.

I can’t comment on Noah and his troubles with the Bulls.  I think Noah just wants to win, and he is letting his teammate know.  Noah is a leader, and there’s nothing wrong with a rookie trying to take charge.  I am guessing Ben doesn’t like Jakim because of the Noah’s pampered life, in comparison to his struggles growing up with 11 siblings.

I gotta run, “Jimmy’s” mom is calling

So today, we are talking about dumb ass writers/players/GMs/anyone related to the league.  Some of these people’s bad decisions have caused suffering among NBA fans.  The best way to cause havoc in this league is to do dumb trades and bad signings.  Here are a few bad signings.

The Orlando Magics rocked the Bulls last night, and the Bulls just looked terrible.  Remember when EVERYONE and their mom picked the Bulls to come out of the East?  I hate to say this, but I TOLD YOU SO.  The Bulls are terrible, and they still have no interior presence.  I have no clue why all the morons at ESPN picked the Bulls to win the East when they have the same team from a year ago, and Wade’s shoulder injury was the only reason for their success in the playoffs.  I just don’t get it.  They have no interior scoring, no reliable shot blocker, and no true superstar?  Speaking of dumb moves, what about Paxson signing Wallace to that huge contract?  Playing D against the Bulls is like playing 5 on 4 because you never have to worry about Ben Wallace.  During last night’s game, Wallace would cut hard to the basket and get the ball close enough for a short jumper or an easy layup, but instead of scoring, Wallace would just pass the ball back out for an errant 3.  This man has no offensive game, and when he touches the ball, it’s like watching  Jim from the original American Pie, painfully awkward.

I was thinking about writing a column on overrated players, and Wallace is definitely high on the list.  Wallace had a few good years in Detroit, and his success comes from being in the right system with the right players.  He had a few good statistical years in rebounds and blocks because no one else on the Pistons likes to rebound.  The Piston’s only other low post player, Rasheed Wallace, likes to roam the 3, and he doesn’t like to rebound because he is lazy.  The Pistons also had puny players at the 2 and the 3.  Rip Hamilton and Tayshaun Prince are both stick figures, and they can’t rebound.  So naturally Wallace gobbled up all the boards.  As far as Wallace winning Defensive Player of the Year, in the years he won, he won by default.  Some of you will raise your eyebrows at this, but it’s true.  Every year Wallace has won, it’s kind of like choosing the lesser of two evils.  In 2001, KG was the second place finisher, and no one really sees KG as that defensive force.  In 2002, Artest was a distant second, and the media was not ready to vote for such a young player.  In 2004 and 2005, Bowen finished second to Ben, and we all know no one wants to vote for a ”dirty” player.  I don’t blame the media for voting Ben as the DPY in those years because there weren’t too many alternatives.  However, if you put Ben in the 90s against Mutombo, Olajuwon, and David Robinson, then it’s obvious Ben is no match for any of those guys defensively.  Ben Wallace winning Defensive Player of the Year during the those years is comparable to the Rockets winning the championship when Jordan was playing baseball; he won by default.

Enough about Ben, let’s shift our focus to another overrated player.  If you haven’t checked out this site, YOU NEED TO! 

http://heylarryhughespleasestoptakingsomanybadshots.com/

No that’s not a typo.  One Cleveland fan is so appalled at the Cavs’ signing of Larry Hughs, he registered a 48 character domain name (No, I didn’t count it, I actually pasted the address in Ms Word and did a word count).  This particular Cavs fan is hilarious, and his in game thoughts are right on.  I mean, why is  the second highest paid player on the team MIA during the 4th quarter and OT?  This only happens when you are the Knicks, not the Cavs…………right?

Speaking of overpaid overrated babies, Nene had surgery yesterday to remove a tumor from manhood….ahem…I mean testicles.  Look, having a tumor anywhere on your body is no laughing matter, especially on your balls.  However, I can’t help but wonder how a 25 year old get a tumor on his testicles.  So I did a little research, and I found that according to the American Cancel Society, testicular cancer is more prevalent in wealthier social groups.  Although the ACS makes mention of why testicular cancer is more common among rich people, I think most of us will agree that wealthy people get lucky more often.  Nene has a 80 million dollar contract and access to girls of Brazil.  Need I say more?  I have one advice for Nene, and it’s a quote from Chris Rock.  “Put that d*ck down! Stop f*c**!!”  At this point, however, it’s time for Denver to move on without Nene.  Nene is like that girl in high school who everyone thought was a big slut, but the reality is she was really A TEASE.  So everytime you thought it was a done deal, something always happens to take you off course.  Nene is that tantalizing talent, but I am afraid the Nuggets will never have him healthy.

I try to find a theme for each one of my posts, and today’s theme is dumbass people.

Moronic writer # 1

“Also, am I the only one bothered by the fact that he’s so non-committal when asked if he’ll continue to drive at triple-digit speeds? If anything, he seems more annoyed at the fact that he was caught than contrite for breaking the law in the first place.”

Okay let’s not go crazy here just because you crave attention and need to scold someone else just to feel superior.  Sometimes, we forget the fact that athletes are also regular people, and regular folks speed.  We might not reach speeds of 101, but I guarantee you some of us have come close.  I don’t go 101 on the highway because my car starts to shake at 60.  But if I have Lebron’s cars, I would be tempted to go 100 everytime I am on the highway.  This moron might make the argument that it’s not about how fast Lebron was going but rather how non-apologetic Lebron was.  Well it’s probably because he doesn’t think it’s a big deal.  Lebron wasn’t cited for a DUI; he was merely speeding.  Let’s cut him some slack here. I am guessing this idiot, Matt Watson, rides a bike and is bitter about those with cars.

Moving on to idiot #2

“Now we’ve won two games, it’s time to go in a different direction.  Let’s trade David Lee, Ronaldo Balkman, and our first round picks for Mike Bibby’s bad ankle and huge contract.  This move will put us even deeper into the luxury tax and allow us to bring in another washed up, old PG to play along side Steph.  Not only that, this helps the team get rid of the young players!!!  WHAT A GREAT IDEA..”

Great idea, Isiah!! Pull the trigger!!! I love this game!

By the way, I told you the Knicks would win without Marbury.  But Marbury is not going to let NY off that easy, which brings us to idiot #3.

“I never said that, it never came out my mouth,” Marbury said. “Why would I retire? Retire for what? Why? What’s the reason? This is the best job in the world. What am I gonna retire for? And sit behind a desk, nah? I’m not stupid, I’m a businessman.”

AHAHAHAAHA….a BUSINESSMAN?  A businessman that’s going to be out of a job soon.  Seriously, what GM is dumb and desparate enough to sign him after his contract is up?  Also, as for being a businessman, his cheap line of sneakers are not doing so well.  When will this guy learn to just SHUT UP!

This Stephon supporter and internet blogger hater is idiot #4

“Count me as someone who wanted to see Marbury succeed in his hometown after failing to become the superstar leader in Minnesota, New Jersey and Phoenix. His inexpensive sneakers, his work with young ballers from Brooklyn, his fierce family loyalty - all made for great stories that mostly got buried because of Marbury’s poor choices on and off the court.”

All I have to say is count her as one of many that has visited Stephon in the back of his truck.